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| If I tell you now, you'll never read it. |
| Hello everybody. It seems like only yesterday when we were chattering away kije carefree children, when I was abducted. Yeah, ABDUCTED, snatched away from my compuer, a glorious career cut short, unexplored and exciting relationships, stunted...hundreds of pages of blog, unwritten All of this because of this stupid alien spaceship, but, fear not, I'm back, with an inner-intestinal chip shoved so far up my ying=yang that it boadcasts to galaxies far away. So, watch your comments. Did you know they have Hungry Man Dinners on Xybercram1673? Don't feel bad, I was surprised too. Now to the matter at hand, Nada telepathically transmitted P-Danny's latest blog to me and I came back down to say something about it. She said it was good, and funny. So I travelled 326 million light year, THIS AFTERNOON so I could type a little message on this antiquated machine. She was right, it was good and funny. To another man as Dan will attest, there is nothing more obnoxious or obvious as a CC changing his demeanor to appear more "cute", or as we say on Xybercram1673, "Wubbable", as you can see even the "Wubbable crap" isn't original, they've been using it for billions of lightyears there. Boy, are my arms tired. So, I agree with you Dan and Tor, that CC's kicking, blinking, and...and.....and Gosh Geeing is a transparent strategy to make his insecure little self seem more wubbable. Before all of his fans jump on me, let me add that you two should be ashamed of yourselves for falling for such a juvenile tactic. I know, it kinda reminds you of a Hallmark card, a cute scruffy little boy under the halo, only to see the slingshot sticking out of his back pocket. I thought this was the era of the bad boy, the shaved headed, tatooed toting, blue jeans around your ankles, motorcycle ridin, hungry man dinner eating wanna be felons. So what is the appeal of blink...blink..kick the dirtm bow the head kind of guy? Now before anybody actually comments, I have to tell you I don't care, there is a saddle for every blogger. Gotta go, Intergalactic real estate opportunities abound. Undoubtdly I'll hae a few hours during the gripping halftime show tomorrow to check in,....did you know they get it on Xybercram1673? Besides, since Nada had t pay for another three month upgrade, sure she'll be intergalacticly nagging me into at least once blog a three month period! And if you think CC's car is nice, wait til I tell ya about mine. |
| Maybe it's none of my business, but Nada has been relating to me the group's conversations about whether to self-publish or go the traditional route. Be serious, is there one among us who would turn down the opportunity to be promoted and published by an existing, mainstream publishing house? I don't think so. I thought that self-publishing was the alternative when one could get no positive response from a literary agent, publisher, or submissions to magazines, etc. The notion that they are in any way equal is rediculous, and personally, if I could get serious, dedicate the time, I would be submitting my work for mainstream publication, and looking for an agent. I have no delusions, I know how hard it would be, and I'm very proud of Nada's accomplishment. As for all my buddies living in my new community, the next time I see your name, I want it to be on a bookshelf, and your face on the "Today Show", and your voice through an intercom box in front of your closed wrought-iron gates, protecting your slate-roofed country manor, paid for by your runaway best seller. Nada just read this entry before I sent it out, and she asked me, "Do you want to discourage people from self-publishing?" No. it's an alternative, but if you share my desire to be read and enjoyed by as many people as possible, self-promotion and self-publishing is a much more difficult route. Who knows how many geniuses of the word were not appreciated by edititors and publishers of their time? Civilization has no doubt been lesser for it. In our world, we have the opportunity to publish and diseminate our work to more hearts and minds than those few who, protecting their jobs, looking for common denominators, pick and choose whose words will see the light of day. So please, write, share and be courageous...because you never know whether or not you will find an audience. It's Sunday morning and I'm going to take several hours and catch up reading your entries, and for the first time, comment on them. Not that I expect you to be holding your breath, because I have not exactly been reliable in the past, and my comments aren't that eagerly anticpated. However this morning I am going to work on becoming a better, virtual citizen. Therefore, time to start reading...... |
| Hello all. There are a few subjects that need my attention tonight...don't all get excited at once. First, Mon Nom d' Plume, some of you don't approve of the name that I have chosen, those cavemen seem to think that referring to my wife, in MY own name is somehow....whipped. BIG DEAL. I prefer to look at it as a tribute to the little woman, at home who toils day in and day out in anominity, while I constantly garner adoration and reward in the larger world, in my own name, In fact, the last time I was referred to as "Nada's Hubby" was in Federal District Court, in Reno, but that clearly is another story. As long as her arm is firmly shoved up my butt, moving my lips, I will contine to be referred to as Hubbyspeaks. Secondly...I need to appologize again (savor these appologies, they are rare from this source) the first was for slaying the English Language....and now for not commenting on your entries and in general, being a bad new citizen of "our community". That reminds me, is anyone yet MAYOR/PRESIDENT/DESPOT/OR MONARCH? WHILE BEING QUITE BUSY MYSELF, I think I could squeeze reigning over this bunch...uh...I mean this .....er....I mean the citizens of this fine community....anyway... Thirdly, to all of my lady readers, well...now's not a good time..but suffice it to say, I know you are out there, and really, really appreciate it...er, and as long as I'm appologizing, (sorry guys there is a new man in town), and finally...it's dinnertime over here at Nada's house, and I'll be bidding you adieu....but don't get too excited, in the words of our Govenor..."I'll be baack!" On a serious note.... nah I will leave it at that.... |
| Well, I'm overwhelmed by alll of your lovely comments and I might say, relieved that nobody took my sarcastic tone to heart. In other words, this is a tough group to insult. By the way, I forget which one of you nitwits referred to this as a community and WELCOME, but it was depressing. You all know why, just depressing. I feel like George Burns, I don't want to belong to any community that would have me as a member. Broke my rythm here by reading Dr. Bubba's contest entry...way to go you heartless bastard. Hmmmm, wait a minute...what are the rules about swearing in my new "community?" In real life, oh shit, is that another mistake? Like this is real life? I'm still confused and depressed. Like I was saying, in my everyday conversation I only swear for dramatic affect, or humor, not to make fun of fat girls Tor. I'm not picking on you...Planner Dan, or as we call him in Hollywood, "P-Dannie", will get his shortly. I hate to mention peoples' names here, because if I haven't, Mel, Forever, Ssythe writer, and Scarlett (what do I get if I get all the questions right? I'm a little competitve). Professor Buckethead, I'm still trying to figure out what you're doing setting up carny's for used car salesmen (social climber). I"ll have my people call your people, we need to talk. I suppose Nada told you of how she "r-e- s-c-u-e-d f-r-a-s-i-e-r"!! (Next time I'll have to tie a six-pack around the little mutt's paws.) Here she comes, I better go....have a shot of tequila. |
| Hello everyone, that's presuming there is anybody out there, I kinda think there is because my lovely wife, Nada, has introduced several of you to me already, by way of sharing your immensely interesting blogs (at the most inopportune moments). Why, I feel like each and every one of you has annoyed me at least as much as Nada. This is meant lightheartedly. I won't be using "lol" or any of those other online jargons because I think they are kind of like canned laughtracks or cuecards. Laugh if you want...get mad if you want, however, you are absolutely forbidden to stop reading. Actually it is a pleasure to meet and get to speak to all of my wife's friends and co-writers....don't worry, I won't be confused with you guys. I do have a question (don't you just hate the new guy questioning all of the rules?), where is the spllcheck? I know, not a problem for you more literate souls, but as for me, I appologize in advance for the hatchet job I will undoubtedly do on the English language. In my upcoming entries I will be telling you a little bit more about myself to provide you with the proper context to justify your future disregard of my comments. But, have to run right now, the polls are about to close in Mosul and, well, you know how important that election is..... |
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