Baby Steps

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **


Ok, baby steps. I have always wanted to write a journal or diary, and have on occasion, at times in my life made a few attempts, only to find myself destroying every page in mortal fear that someone might find it and read it. I was always afraid that if anyone ever found out who I really was, they would judge me as a terrible human being with strange thoughts and opinions, and burn me at the stake. In hindsight I have come to realise that even though I was writing something "for my eyes only" I wasn't even being honest with myself. I think at this time in my life, I have to. I'm 44 years old and can't keep hiding what I am from the rest of the world. Doing this can only bring about depression. To live the way you believe others want you to kills your soul. Since I came to this site, I have been reading other people's journals, and found myself facinated by the bravery and honesty found within them. I have come to understand that sharing your true thoughts and life with others, can be enormously helpful and inspiring.

SO! I have decided to give it a go, (though I'm not sure that I will be able to NOT withhold certain things) and at least begin to try and take a few baby steps towards knowing myself, and trusting others again. / AL