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 |  Empty or full, shiny or a little in need of washing and sometimes just cracked! |
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I heard about these blogs and wondered why people would want to air their dirty laundry online. But I feel safe on this site so maybe it's worth a try. We'll see. This blog is complete. Please find my new blog from the link below...
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A long time back I remember PlannerDan   saying he'd like to have a world map so he could pinpoint where all his friends at WDC lived. I thought this a brilliant idea and searched the shops for months for a decent map of the world, but to no avail.I recently felt the urge again as I also want to track my son's travels but no world maps seem available in shops. Yesterday a huge flat package arrived at my home and I was puzzled to say the least. I wondered if I'd maybe ordered something weird and wonderful off e-bay in one of my drunken stupours. But no, my sister who is a school secretary had ordered a great big map of the world for me out of one of the educational catalogues. I have a set of little flags to track my sons journey and I bought some map pins today to mark where my WDC friends live. So, if you drop by today would you mind leaving me the name of the town/city/state where you live so I can stick a pin in you?  Obviously not every tiny place in the world is on the map so the nearest big place will do. I promise I won't stalk you. I was hopeless at Geography in school and never really caught up with my lack of knowledge.  But 'hands on' learning is something I came to realise works best. Knowing 'real' people are living their lives or travelling in these places captures my interest. I'm really enjoying studying my map and will look forward to filling all the details in. Thanks in advance for your help - you may educate this geography ignoranus yet. Today the world...tomorrow the universe...next year who knows? Mua hah hah hah. |
| Seeing as it's almost the 24th of the month and I have a busy day ahead tomorrow I'm releasing the Blogville News in a few moments. Now all stand back, stop clamouring and get in an orderly queue. I hope you'll enjoy this edition and don't forget to let the contributors know your thoughts on their pieces. A huge thank you to all of them from me; you all did brilliantly. Please spread the news of our little Newsletter to all your WDC friends. |
| I'm starting to think my WDC life is becoming preferable to my 'real' one. If indeed I have one of the latter. Friends in here present me with none of the problems real life people do. 1. They don't phone me when I've just got in the bath and then proceed to chew my ear off about their finances, holidays, grandchildren and the price of carrots...yawn. 2. They don't need me to do their shopping and cleaning, make me listen to Glen Miller or tales from the war or demand I do jigsaws with them. 3. They don't ring my doorbell just as I've settled down at the computer, then force me to make them cups of coffee while they relay their family history, health problems, grandchildren's potty training and the price of carrots...yawn. 4. They don't say 'Did I tell you about..?' then proceed to tell me again, despite the fact I assured them they already had. 5. They don't snore and fart in my bed, hoover when I have a hangover, steam iron behind me first thing in the morning, make model railway engines in the kitchen or hog the remote. Yep, all in all I much prefer the non-invasive, humorous and off the wall atmosphere in here. Do you think I need help? By the way, what is the price of carrots these days? |
| Headline News. Bog cleaning day will never be the same. During the week hubby 'accidentally' sat down too heavily on the loo and broke the seat. No amount of resuscitation techniques could revive deceased toilet seat. The only solution was to purchase a new one. All bathroom suites are white nowadays so no match could be found for our old-fashioned pampas lid. The only alternative was to purchase a wooden one. My bog cleaning session has become confusing now as I assume new seat must be polished rather than cleaned with cloth and bathroom cleaner. My life becomes ever more complicated. Speaking of toilets I read an interesting snippet in a newspaper this week. Apparently the headmistress of a mixed Primary School in Norway is trying to ban little boys from urinating while standing up, due to cleaners complaining males cannot aim properly. This has caused outrage from parents, the church, politicians and the media. Well you can't win Mrs Headteacher because when they sit down on the bog they break the bloody seat. One brilliant moment I had today pre-bog-cleaning was when I clicked on the link David McClain supplied us with of the water hole in Africa. I was rewarded with three adults and one baby zebra drinking from the hole and felt very reluctant to leave them. Even when there are no animals around the sound is captivating so I have yet another addictive site to add to my list. I'm posting a photograph of my 'bargain' from E-bay. I had to use the self-timer on the camera as there was no one around to take a picture for me. Why do men only go missing when you need them to actually do something useful? So it's not the best photo in the world but don't look at the mess, concentrate on the dress. Hey, I've not lost my poetic side after all.   |
| It may be after midnight here but one advantage of time zones is the fact that it's still yesterday where this site resides. Where does it reside by the way? I'm typing carefully as I've had a few (wines) and I promise NOT to go anywhere near e-bay. Nope, just a quick blog entry then up the stairs to Bedfordshire. Actually, I'm only doing this entry for FIVE reasons. 1. I'm trying out these new fancy fonts. Has it worked? 2. To tell you my new dress from e-bay arrived this morning. It's Bootiful - all I need now is somewhere to go and a handsome companion to go there with. Hey - even old ladies are allowed to dream.  3. My friend crackedbizkit has started a blog. Check her out and say hello if you can. Her first entry is a subject close to our hearts despite her culinary preferences. 4. Only FIVE days left to vote for your favourite blogger. Come on folks, make this a competition - someone is running away with the votes at the moment. SEND YOUR VOTE NOW! 5. To say thank you for your wonderful support and hilarious comments. Goodnight and I WUB you all. |
| I'm the first to admit I'm not the fastest or most proficient typist in the world. This can cause problems and embarrassment in the keyboard-orientated world we live in. Blogging and writing aren't a problem as errors can soon be corrected, but I have been known to make some real blunders when it comes to online chatting. The other night I meant to type 'full' but hit the key left of the 'l' twice by mistake instead of the double 'll.' This caused some amusement and raised a few questions regarding my online activities. Being a duck lover you can just imagine how I feel when I mistakenly hit the letters either side of the 'd.' Anyway, last night I entered into a new area of regrettable typos. I've been searching for a new graphics program but those in the shops are either not suitable or too expensive. After a few dry whites I hit on the idea of looking on e-bay. Much as I love the site I don't use it very often due to time restrictions, so tend to forget it exists. Anyway, after a few more dry whites I'd managed to secure myself very reasonably priced copies of Paintshop and Photoshop. Being me, I couldn't just leave it there, so I started perusing through the clothes and came across a lovely red dress. It turned out someone else was bidding against me so I thought I'd just leave a maximum bid and go to bed. That was the moment I regretted - both my decision and the glass refills. Instead of typing £22 as my final offer I somehow managed to miss-hit the keys and set my maximum bid at £2200. A long time and several more glasses later I still couldn't find a way of cancelling my action so left it in the hands of fate. This morning I tackled the site again with a thick head and the fear of being destitute. I discovered how to retract my bid but apparently was too late to do it as there were less than twelve hours left on the bidding. I eventually managed to contact the seller to explain the situation and fortunately she saw the funny side of it. Said she was disappointed she'd have to cancel her cruise to Barbados however. lol Anyway, I won the bid but had to pay a bit more than I'd hoped but at least I won't have to remortgage the house or sell hubby's golf clubs on E-bay. Just a minute though... The slogan 'Don't Drink and Drive' doesn't apply to me as I don't do the latter, but I think I must adopt a new one for myself along the lines of 'Don't Booze and Bid.' |
| I've already put in a request to be a man in my next life. I think I'm going to add a clause stating I want to be a male golf fanatic too. Maybe I should also ask to be a morning person because as I see it, the only downside of being the golfer in the family is having to get up early. I mean, it's okay when you can just load your clubs into the boot and drive off leaving the beds unmade, the pots unwashed, the laundry still in the washer and the bins unemptied. Don't you give it a second thought my dear, all those jobs are my responsibilty after all. I always intend to get all the chores out the way then have a little free time to myself before the golfer arrives back, but that never pans out either. Take this morning. I bought a new doormat the other week. I liked the sentiment on it. 'A messy house is a happy house. This one is delirious.' The colours also match my kitchen. What I didn't take into account was the thickness of it or the label warning it will shed fibres for a while. Every time you go outside you have to move it out the way or the door won't open properly. This morning I went outside to peg out the washing and feed the birds forgetting to move the doormat. When I returned the door wouldn't close and the mat was lodged tightly under the bottom of the door. I spent a happy half an hour wrestling with said doormat and sweating buckets before the bugger would loosen it's grip and come out from under the door. I then spent another twenty minutes hoovering up the millions of loose fibres the damn thing had shed all over the kichen floor during the fight. Eventually I put the kettle on to make a coffee and relax in what little time I had left. Just as it boiled, the golfer returned, pinched my hot water to make his coffee, then asked if I was ready to go shopping as he wanted to pull in another nine holes after the supermarket, while I went to the gym. Is it any wonder I was a little p teed off? |
| Well that's another couple of days with sis gone in a flash. We always have so many plans and good intentions for our time together, but as always we hit hazards and distractions and chickens all over the place. Still, I always enjoy every minute of her company and that's what matters. Inevitably we had a very late night on Thursday and it seems I needed to catch up on that lost slumber last night. Who says you need less sleep as you get older? So after finally greeting Saturday this morn...erm... afternoon all my good intentions went out the window again. Only just managed to catch up on blogs after going to the gym. Reluctantly for sure, but needs must. I feel a grump coming on. I expected that after a few weeks of indulgence, too much booze, the odd dessert, fewer visits to the gym I'd put on a bit of that lost weight. And yes, I have but it's nothing drastic. But what niggles me is why other people I know who eat cakes, crisps, cheese etc all the time and never exercise don't put any weight on at all? Why do I have to work so hard at it and others just sail through? No fair...grump, grump. grump.Since our son set off on his travels I believe a resurrected relative or pet has moved in with us. Knowing we don't want the responsibility of training, walking and feeding a new animal or the cost of vet's bills, fate has sent us a fly. He's very friendly and likes to sit on the arm of the chair while I watch TV or crawl across the monitor while I type. Hubby keeps catching him in one of those insect traps (we're very soft-hearted about sparing creatures) and putting him outside, but lo and behold, next day he always finds his way back in. I think he's emotionally involved with me. I know it's the same fly - I'd recognise that buzz anywhere. He was buzzing about on Thursday evening when sis was here, but she claimed when she arrived home yesterday he'd smuggled himself into her bag and was now residing with her. But today he's back. Okay, he's a bit smaller than when I last saw him but I put that down to the fifty mile flight he's had to make to get back to his home. I actually suspect my sister fly-napped him because she hasn't got one of her own. I think maybe it's time Guy the Fly 2 and I retired for the day. Guy the First was a fly who resided with us some years ago but sadly departed for the great dung heap in the sky. But his memory lives on. Never underestimate the affectionate relationship you can have with an insect. I better buzzzzzzzzzzz off before you swat me. Nighty Night. |
| My sister came over yesterday, although I haven't seen her yet as she's been at our parent's place. I suspect today we'll be taking mother out for an airing, then be spending a boozy night giggling and putting the world to rights. We have so little time together, these sorts of evenings are precious and worth the inevitable hangover. Last night I had a chat to my son on MSN which was great. He and Mark have both now updated their travel blogs and they make entertaining reading. It just feels so weird to be sitting here imagining the places they describe, but thanks to the internet, it's a wonderful way to keep up with their adventures. On someone's advice I then thought I'd have a go at putting what bits I have for the Blogville News together and seeing what it looked like. All sorts of problems reared their ugly heads and made me feel nervous about getting the thing ready in time. After an hour or so, it was looking something akin to David McClain 's versions, so I thought I'd delete it until I have all the contributions. Deleting always makes me anxious with all those warnings. Well, I deleted alright. When I next looked, I'd deleted the WHOLE of the Blogville News - all 18 editions had disappeared.  I was a quivering wreck imagining how I'd have to confess to the world and be imprisoned in Blogville jail for eternity. Eventually I managed to find and reinstate it, but had to lie down in a darkened room with a bottle of dry white to stop the palpitations and panic attacks. I tell you, I'm not a fit person to be left in charge of a Newsletter. Just not a fit person, full stop. But on that note, could all contributors for this month let me have your exquisite pieces as soon as possible please. You know who you are. I only have my own piece and one contribution as yet, so I may have to resort to unleashing Tor to kick your butts if things don't get moving. I won't be putting it together while sis is here of course and certainly not tomorrow on Friday, the 13th, but I think this soft-boiled-egg-brain will need at least a week of panic attacks and cardiac arrests to get the thing sorted. Thanks. |
| After a marathon supermarket trip yesterday, delivering goods to my parents, a long overdue visit to the gym and a cooking session in the kitchen, I finally got to sign in to WDC. Cue for the brain cell to switch off. I found myself unable to think of a thing to write about or the ability to read or comment on a single blog. Although not particularly physically tired, I decided to call it a day and hit the sack. What is it with brains? Or is it just mine? In the evenings, relaxed and with more time, what little is inside my head decides to act brain-dead. In the wee small hours, when the body just wants to carry on snoozing, the brain decides to put in some overtime and writes blog entries, novels and screenplays. Of course, by the time the body finally decides to shift itself out of bed, all that genius stuff has shifted off the mortal coil and is lost in the ether forever. That's my excuse anyway and I'm sticking to it. Oddly enough, while I was scanning a magazine this morning I came across a few facts about brains that got me pondering - 1. Up to 80 per cent of all the information we take in is lost within 24 hours. That explains why my night time hours of wisdom have vacated the premises by the time I get up 2. An average adult brain weighs three pounds and has the texture of a hard boiled egg. I think someone used a faulty egg-timer when they created mine. 3. Short term memory holds information for between 10 and 20 seconds. Where am I? What am I doing in here? Who are you? Who am I? What was I saying? 4. A 70-year-old woman still has about 97 per cent of the number of brain cells she had at 25. Who is she? Where does she live? She obviously ran off with my share. 5. The brain is made up of 60 per cent fat. That explains it then. I've been over-doing the diet and my brain's shrunk. |
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